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Friday, March 6, 2015
(173) The streets are flooded with the ejaculate of the homeless and you people are counting on the police?!* + links
|By Sati.||Friday, March 6, 2015||Rambling Friday|
*It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, 3x14 Bums: Making a Mess All Over the City
I had a pretty horrible week. I really want to dig a hole and just crawl in there. You know just once I'd love to have a 5 day long blissful time at work where I don't have to put up with anyone's crap and no one yells at me. Just once. I just want it to be Friday evening so I can sit down, enjoy some peace and quiet and watch a movie with Matthew Goode and a bunch of The Thick of It episodes.
We finally have first poster for Dark Places, based on the novel by Gillian Flynn....and it's not good.
This looks like something that could be a cover of a young adult novel about some emo girl. But if you think this is bad....we also got a trailer which is fucking terrible.
The sole good news is that the movie appears to be following the novel closely. But seriously everything else? Look I knew this is most likely going to be a disappointment - the book is Flynn's weakest because of the cliche chase near the end and insanely predictable and yet completely unbelievable answer to the key mystery which was so bad, especially comparing to the amazing twists in Gone Girl and Sharp Objects, I couldn't believe Flynn actually wrote this. Then there was the fact completely unknown director is making the movie and the casting which is just awful. If Theron looks like Libby Day then I look like freaking Angelina Jolie. Moretz is miscast as hell too but all you need to know to realize just how terrible that casting is this - they cast Christina Hendricks as a plain woman who can't get a man. WHAT?
Still, it's amazing to me how much they fucked up the marketing here. That the film with all likelihood is bad is not that hard to believe - it's a tricky narrative to adapt, but how do you manage to screw up the marketing here? Theron is a huge star, Mad Men and House of Cards are big shows and Hendricks and Stoll are in the movie, Moretz has fans, fuck knows why but she has, and I'm sure there are some girls with horrible taste who fancy Hoult enough to see this. So how on Earth do you fuck up this bad? The film is getting released in France first, the poster is misguided, the trailer is a mess. That cinematography? That music?
They should have just do what they did with Carrie (an actual masterpiece) decades ago - black screen, just the audio of the murders. That's it.
That company (A24) also bought the rights to The Witch which is my most anticipated movie of the year. I just hope the release of this one will be better. Although it seriously does not look good - A24 acquires interesting films and the marketing just sucks. I realize not every company has the money to market the films all over the place, but the marketing for their movies is just so lacking of imagination and creativity.
Look I still hope that awful trailer is no indication of the movie's quality. But you know what makes me worried the most?
That lame cinematography in flashbacks. The Day family murders are one of the bloodiest, scariest and most horrific murders I read about. When you read the book you can see it in your head - everything crimson from blood, mother's head half blown off, children hacked to pieces....the footage in the trailer looks so badly shot and underwhelming.
And what the hell is happening with Sharp Objects adaptation? It is supposed to be a mini series but there are no news. The book is outstanding and it's almost as good as Gone Girl. It deserves great adaptation
So HBO finally revealed the official poster for Game of Thrones season 5 --------->
This is legit my reaction when I saw it:
What is wrong with these people? This is the biggest show on the planet not a sequel to some cheap straight to video fantasy film! The most embarrassing part is that the picture of Drogon is actually re-used footage from 4x06. It's not even new! This looks worse than fan made...if fan made was made by a monkey just randomly playing with photoshop.
Saddest thing is that this is not even the worst GoT poster. Remember last year? That pale blue background and a raven made out of swords? Are these people on crack?
Also it's now a bit more than a month till season's premiere and we still have only one trailer which was kinda underwhelming. Like I give a shit about Meereen or freaking Sand Snakes, come on give us the good stuff and a better trailer already!
The good news however is that the march on Winterfell is happening this season. Well that's something to look forward too, though we all know what is the one thing I want to see this season. Please come back.
Take a look at this ------>
There are no limits to Redmayne's thirst for becoming the biggest Oscar whore in history. This is the still from The Danish Girl where Oscar bait reaches new levels - Redmayne plays the first man in history to become a woman. And the movie is directed by Tom Hopper. Next year will be even worse than this year, mark my words. Can we say poor Leo already?
Some people said this pic looks like Jessica Chastain. What a horrible insult to her, my God.
Lady Gaga will star in the next season of American Horror Story. This one will be called Hotel. I have very bad feelings about all of this.
The only thing that was not underwhelming this week was the recent Avengers: Age of Ultron trailer:
That was so badass. OMG is Bruce gonna score?!
So I was watching It's Always Sunny and when this happened I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Mac is my favorite, his line deliveries just kill me. I cannot believe how unapologetic this show is, it makes fun of literally everything.
This is insane - this Spanish actress actually managed to deceive the public with photoshoped images
Dan Stevens is going to star as Beast in that new Beauty and the Beast movie. This is actually a really good choice! Luke Evans will be Gaston and I'm kinda sad it's not Matt Bomer after all as he is a better fit for the part. But had Bomer played the part....no one would be looking at Stevens.
The best moment of 2015 Oscars has finally been gifed
Ladies and gentlemen, Keira Knightley
Can The British just proclaim Colin Firth a National Treasure already?
m.brown reviews St. Vincent
Josh lists 10 actors who won Oscars for wrong performances
Brittani chose 3 great movies as her picks for black and white films made after 1970
Ruth reviews Nightcrawler
Alex features brilliant Laura Linney in his In Character series