Engaging in annual Stannis frenzy in 3...2...1....and....
I PRAYED NIGHT AND DAY FOR YOU TO RETURN TO ME!!!!
AND YOU HAVE!!!!!
Oh, BTW - thanks HBO. Thanks for making me crazy horny for the entire month. This has been/is/is gonna be a great atmosphere to learn and work in.
Oh God, my ovaries.
He is back! he is back! My precious king is back!!!!!! Oh God, he is so beautiful. THE CLOAK THE SCRUFF SWEET JESUS
Seriously, that trailer:
Those above gifs come from the set I made this week which got so many notes. I've also got 300 new tumblr followers. I hope they are ready to read my downright disturbing personal posts about how much I love a certain British gentleman nearing 60.
I got in such a frenzy because of Stannis I haven't even raised some issues that this trailer suggested will be happening, because you know, D&D
there is a shot in the camp with Stannis and Melisandre. Is it possible
that Melisandre travels South with Stannis? There is a popular theory
including Melisandre and one of the main characters for what is happening in the next book
and if she is not where she is in the book now...huh.
We'll visit Volantis. So you're telling me that not only did we have to suffer
Talisa but now we are probably going to meet someone connected to her?
And, and you dare telling me 'there is no time'? Fuck you.
It looks like Littlefinger accompanies Sansa to Winterfell. Can you please tell me how this bland little girl and mister twirling his imaginary mustache Batman will outsmart Roose Bolton? He's gonna eat them up and shit them up. I'd love to see that.
EW sent Hibberd to do the article this year. Yes, bravo, for sending the biggest attention grabbing hack you have. I actually suffered through this entire article today and have I got a disappointing scoop for you - that's right, this guy spent 10 days on the set and this is all I learned from his 'piece' - 1. Ramsay has a new person to torture 2. someone who is not dead in the books dies this season and apparently had they been alive they would have a lot to do as they are featured prominently in the book 3. Dorne joins opening credits 4. Ellaria got some of Arianne's lines 5. They yet again confirm Stoneheart won't be in (I swear to fucking God this better be a smoke screen) 6. Nikolaj got harassed by girls everywhere he went in Spain
7. Two cast members woke up drunk and naked after partying hard.
Just let me imagine it was Stephen.
Just give me this dream.
At least the photoshoot is great and the best part is Arya's new look which is 1. stunning 2. something I'd want to wear (seriously going shopping for that) 3. more ladylike than that rag Sansa wore last time we saw her.
We also got 4 covers of EW featuring Arya, Jon, Dany and Tyrion. Because God forbid we feature Stannis.
But honestly maybe it would actually kill me, those 5 seconds in the trailer came damn close...
Also in the other corner of my perversions - you guys! I have actual magical powers!
I tweeted this:
And then, as I do at some point of my day, I started going through Matthew Goode tag on tumblr (shut up, I have a difficult life)
And this! this is what I found!:
I haven't seen the episode yet, but I hear it's a daydream?
What is wrong with this woman ? You are working in the same building as this guy and yet you still haven't ripped off his clothes? I don't like Alicia. That she is stuck up is one thing. But she is also clearly batshit insane and not in a fun way.
I saw Before I go to Sleep. It was not good. What is up with Kidman's eyes? They were so bloodashot, they looked like she was injecting herself with heroin in the eyeballs. I kept hoping Mark Strong will bang her, giving this movie at least one lively scene, but no such lack.
Then I saw Mindscapewhich was really good, the ending was really silly but up until that point it was solid flick. Taissa Farmiga was pretty great in the film and the whole idea was cool - Strong played a memory detective who looks for answers in the protagonist's memory. Also good news - Strong was shirtless in the shower. Bad news is that during this moment he had a hallucination of his dead wife and child.
Why can't I have nice things?
I've been rewatching the second funniest show of all time (after the Thick of it) The It Crowd. If you guys haven't seen it yet, do. It's so fantastic
Have you guys heard of this movie The Lobster? The plot is that in the future "single people are obliged to find mates within 45 days or else be turned into animals and set loose in the wild".
I've just seen my own future and in it I'm a squirrel.
Veep! The first trailer is out as is the poster for the show. I just cannot wait, there are other funny shows out there nowadays like It's Always Sunny and Archer (cannot believe I still haven't seen the last 2 seasons) but Veep is from the creator of The Thick of It which automatically makes it my favorite. Also Kent, Ben and Jonah are all back!
I saw Predestination which was basically one gigantic plot hole made into a movie. But it was interesting. For me all those time travel/paradox movies will always fall apart because either I determine they are impossible after thinking about them for a while or I give up thinking about them because it gives me headache. But the film was quite entertaining and Sarah Snook's performance was really fantastic.
As a lot of you I have been watching Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt and it's just lovely. Funny, witty and so uplifting. That show is really pure girl power. And I have to say Ellie Kemper is one hell of an actress - she was so sweet in the Office, fearless in Bridesmaids, the worst human being ever in Laggies and here as Kimmy she is just the cutest thing.
I notice Jane Krakowski is getting a lot of praise. Don't get me wrong, she is great comedic actress, but here she essentially plays less dumb version of Jenna from 30 Rock. You know the performance she should be getting all the praise and awards was Elaine in Ally McBeal. That was really so much better than her playing these caricatures, as entertaining as she is.
But the real star of the show is Tituss Burgess:
He is so fucking amazing. His delivery of " and then he gets on stage and shouts "'Oh my God....they shot Versace!" - so rude!" made me watch this moment 5 times and I've been laughing so hard. The guy is a revelation. I'm not surprised - I loved Queen of Jordan episodes of 30 Rock and he was hysterical in those.
Have you guys seen whatChloe Sevigny said about Lawrence? I love you Chloe! And for you guys bringing up Brown Bunny - I have more respect for a woman giving her boyfriend oral sex in a film than white trash with tons of naked, crude and degrading pics of herself on her phone, flipping a bird at the backstage of the Oscars and puking on Madonna's yard.
So Chris Hemsworth hosted SNL last Saturday. I can't really discuss this as I haven't seen it BUT there was a rumour that Jane and Thor, my favorite Marvel couple, are no longer together in Avengers: Age of Ultron. And during SNL this happened:
Really? You give the official scoop on this in SNL sketch? If Natalie Portman haven't told Marvel to fuck off yet I hope she did after this.
Hey, I bet you thought to yourself "You know I don't think Tim Burton
can become a bigger whore". WRONG! Apparently Burton is set to butcher
yet another classic story for children. Prepare to read the most
horrific sentence of the week. Ready? Here it goes:
Tim Burton is going
to make live action version of Dumbo.
I seriously wonder if Depp is
going to play the part. No, I actually do. What would be a ridiculous
thought 15 years ago is now a pretty possible option.
Disney set on destroying their own classic? Dumbo live action? Tim Burton? Shit CGI and awful colors which are seriously guaranteed with
these movies? Here we go, to traumatize new generations of viewers.
Look I have no kids and I don't watch animated movies because I'm
always the one in the theater sobbing the loudest, but holy hell can
they just stop destroying kids' childhoods? What the hell is wrong with
these people? Has greed no limits? Well, of course it doesn't, but here
greed meets a complete lack of self awareness and dignity. Speaking of -
maybe Depp will actually play multiple parts? Kinda like those Tyler
Meanwhile Johnny is already on the set of Pirates 6, phoning it in working hard to earn money for his islands and his starlet wife, and this is btw the nicest way I can possibly describe her. And he has been injured!
He was even flown to US for a surgery!
He hurt his hand.
He really lives in a bubble, doesn't he?
I've been enjoying Richard Madden's tour of all kinds of talks shows thanks to Cinderella release. Apparently he is close friends with Kit Harington and Harington continuously spoils the show for Madden. Richard shares all kinds of fun Thrones stories and also there's this: