Friday, December 9, 2016

(265) Tuxpocalypse + links

By sati (harlequinade) Friday, December 9, 2016
  • I saw that finale between 4:30-6.00 AM on Monday before going to work so thanks to the above I was mentally like this pretty much this whole week.
  • Since he is wearing THAT when the hostpocalypse started...does it mean he is gonna wear that tux the whole season 2? Please God yes....for the sake of...realism.
  • The one thing I want (well, not the one but let's keep it somewhat decent...don't worry this post will derail into madness very soon) is for Harris and Hopkins to do a commentary track for episode 5 when it hits Blu-ray and DVD. Can you imagine them commenting on that Pariah orgy? Between Ed I'm not sure what is happening but it's cool Harris and Anthony I'm a distinguished gentleman and give such profound answers Hopkins this would be a laugh riot.
  • m.brown said something lately about proposal scene in Stepmom. So I watched the movie. 
  • Thanks, man. Now all men and all the possible proposals are ruined.
  • While being kinda tipsy completely drunk last Friday I finally saw the entire Abyss. Good God that movie was long. When an underwater alien showed up and grabbed Ed Harris' hand and they swam together I looked at my drink very suspiciously and asked it "what are you?". At one point though something finally started happening and Harris' shirt started coming off during a fight scene so I got momentarily conscious and excited but then it rolled back :(
  • There are almost no gifs from that movie on tumblr. I would make some but I already made the ones that opened this post so I fear for my health.
  • That resuscitation scene, though. When he yelled NOOO and just started slapping this chick I laughed so hard. It reminded me of Cartman yelling 'Do it! Do it!' to the guys to zap Kyle again. Turns out that I was right as that scene in South Park directly spoofed it.
  • I hate James Cameron so much. First he ruined Alien franchise by getting it from the horror genre track to the retarded action movie track. Then I almost got a bladder infection during Avatar because I really had to pee but didn't want to leave since I thought something will finally happen. So I sat there and it didn't. And now I am reading he almost killed Ed Harris: 
  •  During underwater filming, Ed Harris almost drowned. While filming a scene where he had to hold his own breath at the bottom of the submerged set, Harris ran out of air and gave the signal for oxygen. Harris' safety diver got hung up on a cable and could not get to him. Another crew member gave Harris a regulator, but it was upside down and caused him to suck in water. A camera man came over, ripped the upside down regulator, and gave him one in the correct orientation. Later that evening, Ed broke down and cried. 
  • And then there was this:
  • Ed Harris punched James Cameron in the face after he kept filming while he was nearly drowning.
  • What is wrong with Cameron?! Did the pressure thing that happens underwater mess up his brain? I don't think this guy ever emerges anymore, he just sits in that capsule underwater coming up with shitty ideas for Avatar sequels which hopefully never manifest themselves in the form of even shittier movies.
  • Oh God J-boo....this is just tragic. What is this outfit, what is this hair? 
  • In other bad news Family Guy made a joke about him. Suicide Squad also keeps showing up among 10 worst movies of the year lists. I smell a Razzie...
  • In other really bad news for DC fans (is there any other kind?) Flopmaster Armie Hammer is probably in Batfleck's Batman movie. So that bodes well...
  • The Honest Trailer for Suicide Squad went surprisingly easy on the movie and J-boo. I hear most of the Screen Junkies liked the movie. Huh. 
  • I still haven't seen the extended edition but I saw this today because people were laughing about it on the Hype and I just can't.
  • The new Live by Night poster is hilarious. Literally every single thing about it is funny. The tagline, the botox, the eye-test font...
  • Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone are campaigning for the Oscars relentlessly. Gosling has just done this and Emma is emerging as the front runner now that it seems Jackie is too complex for the Academy people (somewhere Viola's snot is shivering in fury that she switched to supporting). If these people weren't so charming the thirst would be off putting but they are both so likable It works.
  • Gosling was also asked about Blade Runner sequel and this was his input:
  • The complete opposite of Stone and Gosling is the duo of JLaw and Pratt.
  • When you are sitting on a coach with a pet abuser and in this moment you still have less class than him
  • Pratt himself in the past said this - "I’m definitely pro-hunter, but elephant is something I would never shoot. I would like to hunt in Africa. I’d like to hunt all the game animals in Africa. The sh*t that’s being hunted today–like a gazelle, springbok, kudu, all that stuff. All those animals are really beautiful; you could feed some people, get a cool trophy out of the deal."
  • "The shit".
  • I mean she is just stupid. He is a genuinely vile person.  That's cool baby Groot is cute or whatever in that new trailer, but I'm not watching it, neither I'm watching the movie no matter how good it is. I won't sit through anything featuring Pratt.
  • As for JLaw can she finally go away forever? How does Aronofsky go from Rachel Weisz to this?
  • Meanwhile JLaw's BFF is right that she is getting 'shit done' because her show is so unfunny and cringe worthy. This chick is just the worst - her little instagram message has the 24 uses of the word 'I' . Her and Lena Dunham want people to call them beautiful so badly. That they look what they look like is secondary - what is preventing anyone from considering them beautiful is how insecure these chicks are. For such a 'strong woman' who doesn't care about haters it is particularly hilarious Schumer lies about her size. She says she is size 6. Bryce Dallas Howard is size 6. I am size 6. Schumer is 12 at least. If she came out and said "I'm size 12 and I don't feel fat" I'd have respect for her. Look at Adele - beautiful inside and outside. But all of's just sad to read and witness, really.
  • One day they will make a movie about Heroina and it will make Joan Crawford look like really chill and caring mom.
  • This whole thing is terrible and the director is an asshole who has no decency (shut the fuck up man, there is no excuse) but what I'm wondering here is this - does Jessica Chastain do anything else these days then star in movies that fall off the radar instantly + acts professionally outraged on twitter? She is not even calling out the director but the people who 'love the film'. That lighting bolt on her forehead must move so fast she cannot even aim her fury right.
  • Tom Ford says a lot of stuff here most of which is stupid as hell, but the thing that is also in the title...He is not wrong about what women go through. He knows fuck all because he is a man but at least he seems to be grasping the idea. However I doubt any guy will take his advice on this, also this is not the same thing at all.
  • I'm not gonna be judgemental about this sort of thing. I did the math and there is 44 years of difference and $150.000 a year. Well considering the opening paragraphs that is 39 and I'd go for free....however Mick Jagger never looked like this. I sense I should stop rambling now. 
  • ...
  • .....
  • So anyways...
  • Johnny 9 Digits was voted the most overpaid actor in Hollywood for the second year in a row. No argument there, but why is DiCaprio on this list? He sells the shit out of this movies. The Revenant made an insane amount of money and it was a boring as hell film filled with shots of snow, sky, forest and moaning DiCaprio. And people went to see it mostly to see him whore himself out to get the Oscar. That dude is worth every penny.
  • James Franco is gonna be in Alien:Covenant. With him and McBride both being there I'm gonna go ahead and say this is Hell from This is the End.
  • Also we've got so much info about the first trailer yesterday. First it sounded bad, but then 15 minutes of the movie and the trailer was screened for the journalists and they raved about it. The trailer apparently features lots of gore and cover of David Bowie's song. As I predicted it is going to be attached to Assassin's Creed.
  • Jimmy Kimmel is gonna host the Oscars. I don't really care about the ceremony this year but at least it won't be "the white people suck" shitshow from last year which was unwatchable.
  • I'm so excited for Golden Globes nominations on Monday. I hope Jeffrey Wright, Ed Harris, Evan Rachel Wood and the show get nominated. And of course Anthony Hopkins. Do you know he only has a honorary Golden Globe? He didn't even win for The Silence of the Lambs! I haven't seen much of his work from 80's and 90's but I'd say he has not been as wonderful as he is in Westworld since that movie. It's a tremendous performance. Everyone watched that show so closely and yet him and the writers managed to keep the truth about his character from us till the very end. Just wonderful.
  • Brittani recaps Westworld and The Walking Dead
  • m.brown saw Bad Moms and liked it less than me. Something is very wrong here. 
  • Ruth shares 5 favorite opening themes from TV series


    1.'ve never seen Stepmom? I loved that movie when I was younger lol.

      I like that you actually hate James Cameron for his directing choices and I hate him for being a general pretentious douche.

      Ew. I really like Chris Pratt, what is this shit with animals all of a sudden?

      That Suicide Squad clip is really, really bad.

      Why the hell are the Globes announcing on a Monday? That's my sleeping in day, wtf is this. lol

      1. Never had a reason to see it before now :D

    2. Hit enter too quickly, thanks for the link!

    3. I'm so anxious for that Alien: Covenant trailer just to hear what Bowie song they use.....

      J-Law has become insufferable... she and Schumer need to get their asses kicked by Evan and Scar-Jo 3:16.

      You watched Stepmom?

      1. I think it's gonna be Space Oddity, it just fits the most

        Yeah I did :) It was actually pretty good but that proposal scene blew my mind

      2. And what did you think of little Jena?

      3. She was great! Very impressive performance considering how young she was there

    4. Hey thanks for the link Margaret! Glad you saw The Abyss in its entirety. Yeah I think Cameron tends to endanger their actors in their films, but I hadn’t read that story about Harris, my goodness! Glad Harris punched him!

      Ahah, that poster of LIVE BY NIGHT does remind me of an eye exam!

      Btw, I’m so tired of seeing J-Law and that is so tacky & insulting that she told that story about sitting on the Hawaiian sacred rock. So disrespectful.

      Oh I have a very good feeling Westworld will get some Golden Globes noms. And I haven’t even seen it yet, ahah.

      1. You're welcome! Yeah I'm glad he punched him too, what an asshole to keep filming

        It got 3 for series, Evan and Thandie but all the guys were snubbed :/

      2. Yeah, I posted about GG noms and was surprised neither Hopkins nor Harris got noms. I'd think those two were pretty strong contenders. In any case, I can't wait to finally see it hopefully next week! :)

      3. I hope you'll like it! Think of me hyperventilating whenever Ed Harris takes his gun out which is a lot :P

    5. Ryan Gosling's comment about Harrison Ford is amazing. I mean, what else can you say?!
      Also, can we definitely be sure that's Jared Leto in that god awful photo? Seriously, what is up with that haircut!! Is it for a role??
      I'm so sad Westworld is over. Please supply us with gifs until Season 2 :(
      - Allie

      1. He actually has entire story about Harrison, I'll share it in next RF :)

        I think it's just J-boo's choice...that fringe is horrible :/

    6. James Franco in an Alien movie? Sigh... "Flopmaster Armie Hammer" - that was funny!

      1. I thought he will finally be in a hit where those good reviews started coming from Sundance for that Nate Parker movie and we all know how this turned out....the guy is cursed

    7. You should check out the Making Of documentary about The Abyss if you can. It really shows how batshit crazy that production was. Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio isn't even in the doc. The moment the film wrapped, she peaced out and never had anything to do with the film again.

    8. Yeah I read about that! It sounds like hellish nightmare what they went through. i wanna see this doc I think it's on youtube...I heard Harris actually tears up while recalling almost drowning