Friday, December 23, 2016

(267) Merry Xmas! + links

By sati (harlequinade) Friday, December 23, 2016
  • Merry Christmas! Here's shirtless Ed Harris in Knightriders.
  • You are catching me on my worst week since like 6 months. Or years. Work has been a nightmare this week. Like seriously awful, awful stuff. But let's just...look at that gif above. And drink. A LOT.
  • I'm kinda hammered right now so this is probably gonna be worse than usual.
  • Over the weekend I have indulged myself in some more of Mr. Harris work. I have now seen zero Oscar movies out of the current season and about 10 Ed Harris movies this month alone. And it's only 23rd. I have so much left to watch.
  • Harris worked three times with the pride of Poland Agnieszka Holland. They made that horrible Beethoven movie together (it's so awful) but they also made To Kill a Priest (which is based on a very famous killing in our history) and Third Miracle where he plays a priest.
  • So if I watch the latter and the Catholics are right and Hell is real then I'm definitely going there. Because there is no way anything not depraved would go through my head during this movie.
  • In other words I'm so seeing it this weekend. Probably tomorrow on Christmas' Eve for full perv effect.
  • Last Friday I saw Knightriders and I did live tweet some of that in mature and intelligent ways. Halfway through I gave up on perving publicly and just perved in private going like this --->
  • The film was shockingly accessible but keep in mind I was wasted while watching it. Bright Eyes was shirtless for 50% of that movie. I barely made it out alive.
  • On Saturday I saw Absolute Power directed by Clint Eastwood and starring Clint himself, Laura Linney, Ed Harris, Gene Hackman and Judy Davis in a hilarious over the top performance. The film was entertaining and the cast was great but I want to talk about this:
  • There was a scene where Ed Harris (who plays a cop) takes Laura Linney home. Her character was almost killed when a sniper started shooting. During this scene Ed Harris keeps mentioning he lives alone, with the heavy subtext of 'I like you, can I stay?' and yet she doesn't ask him to stay.
  • What the fuck, Laura Linney? Even if I wasn't just almost killed, I'd probably tear off his clothes or at least go "oh officer I am so scared please stay here with me" *looks down, looks up sheepishly, bites lip*
  • I also saw Eye for an Eye which was just so trashy. Sally Field and Ed Harris played the parents of a girl who was raped and killed and seriously you wouldn't have told that from their acting (except for one scene in which he cried). They were too chill about this which was in disconnect to what Field's character was trying to do through the entire movie. Well, at least he looked super handsome in this.
  • IMAX made a hilarious error and accidentally uploaded that Mummy reboot with Tom Cruise trailer without some of the sound effects. I cannot seem to find it now because the studio keeps pulling it off the web. You know, to spare the movie ridicule. As if it's not ridiculous enough. Anyways someone mixed Tom Cruise's ridiculous screams with Star Wars footage and it's probably the best thing you'll see all week. Or month. And here is yet another mash-up.
  • We finally have the glorious first Blade Runner 2049 trailer and the first pictures. Doesn't Harrison look super psyched to be there? 
  • He looks like I look and feel on Monday mornings. And Tuesday mornings. And Wednesday mornings...yeah, you get the picture..
  • Also why the fuck does Ana de Amas had to be so not terrible in War Dogs and look so pretty in that pic here? I hate her performance in Knock Knock almost as badly as I want to climb the God in the first gif of that post. I'm so confused right now because she looks just lovely and probably gonna be our new Rachael figure. 
  •  It's worrying me a little bit that Gosling has the exact same expression on all of those pictures. Please let this performance be Gosling in Drive and not Gosling in Only God Forgives.
  • Alien Covenant trailer is most likely coming tomorrow, Christmas Day at the latest. It's amusing that we still don't have the trailer yet the entire plot of the movie leaked. Well, it's a better story than Prometheus and from the looks of it the film doesn't have a single scene as dumb as Idris Elba or Charlize Theron's death scene but it's still not the best. Let's hope the execution is gonna be incredible. Also it sounds Fassbender has one hell of a role(s) here and damn, does that guy need it after pretty much all he was in in 2016 bombed.
  • God bless Dolores and her horrible taste in men.
  • So Michael Sheen is a dumbass. Few days before "a refugee" killed a Polish driver and slaughtered innocent people in Berlin, Sheen was proclaiming it's so awful that right wing parties are in power and he may in the future quit acting to help 'fight it'.  
  • Sheen whose show - which didn't have that big of viewership in the first place - was just cancelled would quit that 'career'  to 'fight' right wing influences in UK. 
  •  I'll let that sink in.
  • The media actually reported that he is quitting acting. He went in on tumblr to explain and then he explained an explanation. This is all so embarrassing in the first place for a grown ass man with all kinds of public relations people to declare this on tumblr but the stupidity here is just insane. And that goes for all the batshit liberal celebrities. The democracy in my country is on the brink of collapsing thanks to our right wing ruling party but you know what? At least they are against letting 'refugees' in. Have you guys read about the guy who killed all those people? How many times he broke the law? And yet he was still here in Europe? It's just so fucked up.
  • Why don't those rich celebrities bring some of those 'refugees' to their homes near their women and children? Do that and then talk to us about what is right and wrong.  
  • Also read this SJW having a meltdown because La La Land is about white people (gasp!). He goes about it as if Gosling was dancing around with white sheet on his head while Emma Stone yells the N word.
  • Next topic:
  • I very much enjoyed the de-aged/artificially created characters in Rogue One because it was done for continuity's sake. But it seems that Hollywood is gonna continue doing this on a larger scale. While I won't go as far as to call it, as one hysterical reviewer did, 'unethical' it's creepy as hell. 5 or 10 minutes of footage like that is OK,  but imagine if they make most of the movie this way or resurrect dead actors to create new performances. This is not right. It's a CGI replica of a person, not an actual person (I feel like we are almost in Westworld territory with the ethical dilemmas here). Movies create illusion and immersion but you cannot suspend your disbelief for this long. You know how old actor is or that he is dead. Something that can be a cool little moment stretched to long portions of time is just disturbing. Also it must be so unpleasant for someone to see their face CGIed to look younger.
  • I know I joked few weeks back about how cool (that's not the word I'm looking for here...) would it be to make porn with de-aged Ed Harris but my imagination works fine enough, thank you.
  • I don't know how to do a proper segway from my humorous remark about porn so I'm not eve gonna try but as I am about to publish this Carrie Fisher who was actually just digitally inserted into Rogue One was reportedly taken to hospital after suffering a massive heart attack. She hasn't been breathing for around 10 minutes on the plane. She is so important to so many people...this year is truly horrible.
  • Now let's do another horrible segway....
  • So Live by Night got some serious fisting action from critics. My first instinct was making this face --->
  • because Batfleck is literally the only hope DCEU has left. I actually don't think it's even full blown hope - it's like a chance...of a glimpse...of hope. That's how much DCEU sucks at the moment. But Batfleck's new movie getting trashed is quite literally the worst thing that could happen to DCEU right now. Until next month when it gets like 20 Razzie nominations. At least.
  • However look at this quote from one of the reviews:
  • Based on a 2012 novel by Dennis Lehane, the film is sharply written and crafted, lavishly photographed, impeccably acted, with lots of twists and turns — yet for all that, it somehow lacks zing. I say “somehow” because the flaw, or limitation, or whatever it is about “Live by Night” isn’t obvious. 
  • ...what?
  • In other words Kirk Lazarus warned us all and yet people keep going full retard all over the place. 
  • MettelRay reviews Nocturnal Animals
  • Brittani, Ruth, Keith and m.brown review Rogue One
  • Alex wrote a brilliant article about the curse of twin movie


    1. I just read that about Carrie Fisher. I hope she's okay.

      I thought Tarkin looked great in Rogue One, but I feel like situations like that are the only time it's called for. I hope it doesn't become a huge thing.

      Evan and Jamie were a cute couple. I wish they would've worked.

      See some Oscar movies, damn it lol.

      Thanks for the link!

      1. Eh there is no Ed in Oscar movies this year...and NAnimals blew :D

    2. I didn't realize the Alien Covenant trailer was right around the body is ready for it.

      1. I really loved it, good thing the movie is not as far away as Blade Runner

    3. I heard Carrie Fisher is OK now. The Force is strong with her. She wasn't going to let 2016 take her.

      I'm not entirely surprised about Evan dating her bandmate. At least it's not Manson again, ugh....

      I liked Absolute Power as Ed was awesome in that film.

      1. Ed is so cool whenever he plays cops :) An this one was such a sweet one too

    4. The news of Fisher being stable now gave me some hope.. 2016 is really trying to be the worst year ever it seems but it won't get us anymore! The horrors need to be done with.. seriously, it's enough...

      I always thought Evan should have stayed with Jamie Bell because I thought that relationship seemed to be the best for her. But then again, what we see is not how things are, so I guess she has found new happiness. I'm still team Bell though, and I think he is still rooting for his team as well even though he is with Kate Mara...

      I thought the de-aged software and the CGI stuff in Star Wars was scary.. sure, way to go technology, but it freaking scared me.

      Oh and Blade Runner looks so so promising I'm just hoping the script is solid. It seems like every big movie this year was brought down by the messy script - it's like a curse.

      Happy holidays!

      1. Yeah the script will be a key thing here - Villeneuve is good but when the script is trash like with Prisoners even he cannot save it :/

        Carrie Fisher just passed away...what a crappy year

    5. Thanks for the link Margaret! Sorry to hear about how awful work has been. Well I’m glad there’s Ed Harris to cheer you up :-)

      Ahah, what is it w/ Laura Linney?? She’s also the crazy woman who kept answering her brother’s call even DURING sex with an adonis who looks like Rodrigo Santoro!! Funny how he AND Ed Harris are both in Westworld, ahah.

      Mwahahaha, well Harrison doesn’t seem like the kinda guy who can hide his feelings. Looks like work on Monday mornings, ahah, well it doesn’t look like Gosling brings joy to him as his co-star. Um, I always think Gosling is a one-note actor, he has the same expressions throughout La La Land as well. Either blank or smug, blech.

      Oh and about Carrie Fisher… I pray she’ll come out ok. Boy 2016 truly has been rough! Here’s to a much more joyful 2017, cinematically or otherwise.

      1. You're welcome! Yeah thank God for his many many movies at least it keeps my mind off things

        Yeah Rodrigo is pretty good on Westworld! i think this is his best performance of the stuff I saw him in

    6. Happy holidays Sati!!!!

      I'm just kidding, MERRY fuckin XMAS, and fuck political correctness! ;P

      I love how you move from star to star with your crushes. Its so fun to read. I loved that kitty gif. Ed Harris really is great though, I actually really like The Rock and Enemy at the Gates (despite Jude Law) and I've gotten up to episode seven of Westworld. Holy shit it has gotten interesting now, can't wait to round out the season.

      Will have to read your post more closely when I have time, gotta see that trailer for Bladerunner. Cannot wait for that!! Hehe, Harrison looks so depressed.

      And sorry to hear you've been feeling so shitty. I hope you feel a bit better over the holidays :-) Keep looking in Ed's eyes and forget all your troubles ;)

      1. Looking in Ed's eyes helps but unfortunately I need to stop and go to work :/ I never really move away from my crushes so the massacre of 2016 is still looming and I fear for my favs so much, God this year really is cursed

        So glad you are digging the show! The last few episodes are insanely intense, the finale was completely surprising even for Westworld geek like me

        Hope you had good holidays!