Thursday, September 21, 2017

(305) I Hart You + links

By sati (harlequinade) Thursday, September 21, 2017
  • Here's boo kangaroo on the set of The Front Runner, that Gary Hart movie directed by Jason "I probably won't give you a hot sex scene with boo boo given what my track record is" Reitman.
  • The wig ain't the best but he is in a suit. I don't even know which place to look at, specifically, it's all so...lovely.
  • That right here is just so much
  • And he is so big.
  • I'd climb him like a deranged monkey climbs a tree.
  • While drooling...everywhere.
  • Oh, bless this project.
  • This however is not good. The eyebrows and that he playing Gary Hart or Tonya Harding? This is not an acceptable wig. If Hugh has to wear one he should always wear Logan one. The queen of wigs of...hotness.
  • (*remembers when he broke that shotgun on his knee*)
  • (*bites lip*)
  • (*blood everywhere*)
  • He's really incapable of not tweeting shameless porn, isn't he?
  • They sent Logan screeners to the members of the Academy. Vote wisely, you fuckers. Vote wisely.
  • I mean I really don't want to have to slaughter a bunch of goats and curse whoever made a decision to release Logan in March instead of in the Oscar season which is the thing that will most likely prevent it from getting nominations. I really don't want to do that. Please don't make me.
  • If this happens I will burn Fox to the ground. I will burn it. To the motherfucking ground. I have nothing to lose. I'll do it.
  • So my weekend went like this:
  • Pedro Pascal's pubes and Boyd Holbrook's bare ass as he leaps out of the bed. What an awesome show. No, seriously. Like the story and acting and stuff is very good. But if it wasn't for these fine men I probably wouldn't watch it because I'm a shallow whore.
  • No, but he is narrating. Narrating. Like literally that voice...through the entire episode. Every episode. I cannot remember the last time I witnessed such a good use of something. Like, imagine if Game of Thrones was a good show written by competent writers and it was narrated by Iain Glen and he had Southern accent which makes you feel all naughty and dirty. It's like that. Heavenly stuff.
  • Hey speaking of Boyd, he is the lead in that Shane Black's Predator movie that premieres next year. I will definitely see that. The idea of Shane Black making a Predator movie is insane. Also Jacob Tremblay is in it. That thing is gonna be so ridiculous. Hopefully Boyd narrates this one also. 
  • I'm actually sick this week and I'm staying home and you'd think that this means I at least sat down and saw some movies, huh? Nope. I am sleeping 13h a day. I think I may actually have depression. But c'est la vie, I guess.
  • The only film I saw was Annabelle: Creation and it was very good. It was a far more scary and atmospheric movie than It. I think it was even scarier than The Conjuring 2. There was a lot of cliche jump scares but there were also a lot of very nicely set up scares and I liked how practically the entire movie was set in the house in the remote location. It felt very old school. I am so psyched for The Nun next year!
  • Truly horrible poster for that new Tomb Raider movie. And here's the really bad trailer for it. 
  • Awesome first trailer for The Punisher.
  • Slightly less terrible than the last one trailer for The Murder on the Orient Express.
  • In spite of the great early word the reviews for Kingsman 2 are mixed. Thankfully the box office is strong and hopefully will continue to be strong because this needs to happen:
  • Dammit I DESERVE it.
  • And here's JB on the London premiere of the film:
  • *sigh* I miss my dog so much...It's so lonely and quiet and shitty. I feel like I am dying. It's just this deafening noise of silence. I have all of you, you guys who read my words. But you're not actually here. And it's just me. On my own. This girl who has no one. My beautiful Gustav kept me from feeling so lonely but now he is gone and here I am. It's the worst I ever felt like. There's no one. There's no one. This is the problem of blogging internationally. You all know me, you'd take me to a movie with you but you are all so far away. So here I sit. Utterly alone. Hopeless, just trying to...go on. I'm sorry I know this is the column that makes you all laugh but it's hard to find a grip anywhere to continue to do that. The truth is that I have no one anymore. And I don't know how long I can keep going like this. So each of your posts keeps me going. Because I really have nothing else keeping me going anymore. I'm just so hopeless and this blog community is probably the only thing I have left. I mean it, I am not being melodramatic it's all I have.
  • Jesse Eisenberg's pitiful take on Lex Luthor was apparently cut from the current version of Justice League so that's one less shitty thing to worry about there. 
  • Paramount did the only thing they could do - release a statement backing Aronofsky and mother!
  • This is practically abuse, isn't it? 
  • Jackie Hoffman's reaction to losing an Emmy was hilarious.
  • Reese Witherspoon refusing to let go of the Emmy when Nicole Kidman wanted to hold it. She really comes off like a major bitch.
  • New season of Graham Norton Show begins next Friday and unfortunately Reese is gonna be a guest BUT there's also going to be Margot Robbie, Ryan Gosling and Harrison Ford so that's gonna be one hilarious episode.
  • and finally enjoy these pictures of drunk Jessica Simpson
  • Brittani and Steven review mother!
  • Dell writes about Batman and Harley Quinn
  • Allie reviews Rough Night
  • Alex uploaded his movie Wait on Vimeo which means that now all of us outside of US can watch it!
  • Sonia sat through Pan and she is not hopelessly in love with Hugh Jackman which means she had even worse time with this one than I did
  • Jay reviews The Shape of Water
  • m.brown shares heartwarming tales of finding dead pigs in the sewers and reviews It



    1. Aw, thanks for the link-love. Ugh, what did J-Law do to Javier? I hope Penelope had to comfort him from that repulsive shit. They need to call Scar-Jo 3:16 so she can lay a can of whoop-ass on J-Law. Just give her 2 six-packs of Scar-Jo-Weisers and she's ready to stomp a mudhole on J-Law.

      I will not watch any reboot of the Wolverine w/o Hugh Jackman.

      That dog looks so cute. It's OK to cry. I know how you feel. Still not over my pets either.

      1. Yeah I will boycott anything Wolverine without boo. Fox would have to be insane to do that

    2. What is that wig he is wearing? That's just blasphemy! What did they do to him?!

      OMG, Nicole is freakin' sweet. I was so happy she won. Watching Reese and Nicole's faces, I don't think they were trying to fight over the Emmy but focusing on the hands it definitely looks like it. I think Nicole was trying to hold it as Reese talked but she was not letting go. lol

      Ryan, Harrison and Margot are going to be hysterical on Graham.

      I'm so sorry that you lost Gustav. When Lola passed away two years ago, it was the hardest thing ever. She was my best friend, practically a therapy dog , for 13 years. I can't promise that the grief entirely goes away, but over time, I've been able to make more room for it, which makes days when I miss her a lot a little smoother. If you need someone to chat with, feel free to DM me! *hugs and love*

      1. I want to rip this wig - and his clothes - off him immediately.

        I haven't actually seen the ceremony but this clip made me laugh so hard. Reese seems a lot like her character on the show.

        Thank you so much, that is so sweet of you to offer :*

    3. I hope you can find something in your RL that will cheer you up. I wish I could say something that would cheer you up, but I fear unless I can hack a Jackman sex tape from somewhere I'll fail.

      I've heard really good things about Narcos but I haven't watched it myself. I binged all of American Vandal this week and that show was hilariously stupid.

      They're STILL editing The Justice League?

      Thanks for the link!

      1. I hope you can hack that sex tape :)

        Narcos is very gripping. And the hot guys make it very entertaining :)

        I think they finished editing only last week lol :P

    4. OMG that wig is bloody awful! Just like the Tomb Raider poster which is why I didn't even bother watching the trailer. I saw the Punisher's though, and I can't wait for the show.

      Thanks for the link! I gotta say I chuckled at the not hopelessly in love part.

      1. Punisher is gonna be great. That's pretty much the only Marvel show I have any interest in since the last season of Daredevil would be quite awful without Punisher scenes

    5. The poster is just lacking any imagination, but I still hope it will be a good movie... At least it has someone who can actually act well!

      1. Well Angelina did act well :) Also first Tomb Rider was filled with quite a lot of talented supporting actors

    6. Sorry to hear you are dealing with loneliness after Gustav passed. Talking about it is the first step, so kudos for that. It’s tough making new friends, especially if you are shy and don’t have others to lean on when going out. I can mirror myself in what you say, I went through a few years in my 20s without lasting friendships. In my 30s, I’ve made it a goal (despite being an introvert who is easily over-stimulated) to get out more. Going to parties is hard. A small group, with a shared activity is easier. I suggest finding something you enjoy doing with others (could be film club, a group of animal lovers, sports, etc), and then, if you enjoy it, keep returning every week, and you will become a known face at the venue(s) of choice. I made a friend that way and we play a sport once a week. What I learned is you need to be consistent with your socializing. Just going once or twice isn’t enough. It takes time, months/years, to make a proper friend. There's more to life than blogging. Good luck :)

      1. Thanks so much for your kind words and advice. I have been branching out a bit and posting on national boards a bit lately but I'm not sure if I ever will turn things around. I am a weird person I'm simultaneously antisocial yet I feel weird and awkward with my antisocial indoorsy ways.

    7. If Logan doesn't get those nominations...

      Currently going through my own awards picks, and yeah, Logan is currently still in the far lead of just about every single category. Almost October, and thus far, great as some other movies may have been, nothing's come close to topping Logan this year for me. :P

      As to Justice League, the sheer amount of changes Whedon has made leaves me very hesitant going in. At this point, much as I may have liked the trailers, I sorta doubt any of that footage will even be retained anymore, and it'll be a Joss Whedon production from start to finish. Not really sure how I feel about that, nor how I'll feel if Snyder retains sole directing credit, either. :\

      1. Dunkirk snatched few wins from Logan for me but only few.

        Justice League being anything above mediocre will be a miracle. I doubt I'll even go see it in theaters at this point.

    8. Sending you hugs and more hugs, and though I'm not there, I'm there in thought. I understand what you're going through, not in such capacity because I've always have had trouble connecting with people and animals as deeply, but I know how that void and emptiness feels. My mom called me last week to tell me our family dog had passed away, I felt crushed and sad and most importantly, I felt heart broken that I couldn't even say goodbye. It's never easy to lose someone important to you, it's not easy to be alone after that and have that absence of someone who had been apart of you for so long. You are strong, and you are amazing and I know nothing I write could ever help as much as I want to help you right now, but know that I'm always here, not that far away really, rooting for you.

      PS: Going to watch Narcos soon because I haven't seen it yet and I feel like I've missed out.

      1. I'm so sorry about your family dog ;( I'm really not strong. I suppose I still have my sense of humour and most of the time that does help a little bit.

        Oh you did. The ass is in the first few episodes and it's wonderful. The rest of the show is worth seeing too.

    9. Sending you lots of hugs and for the loss of Gustav, I know the feeling of losing a loyal pet.

    10. Ohhh that Tomb Raider poster just gets worse with every second I spend looking at it. Thankfully the Punisher trailer is so amazing I very quickly forget all about it. I want to hug the editing team behind that trailer, I can't even express my love for it enough!
      I hope you're doing better my lovely - I'm thinking about you x

      1. The editing of the shots with the beat of the music near the end of the trailer really is incredible.

        Thank you :*

    11. Sending you lots of hugs and support for the loss of your dear sweet Gustav. It's totally understandable and normal to feel awful. He was your companion and now he's gone. I have struggled with situational depression too. It's no fun. But your honesty is refreshing. It helps other know they aren't the only ones suffering. I hope things get better.

    12. the tomb raider poster gave me a good laugh for sure! I always imagine spine-less people sitting in a meeting and they're all like "wow this looks great", I mean, how else does this happen?!
      I swear sati, you're in my head, everytime I go see a movie.. has she seen this? will she like this?
      but you still surprise me, never thought narcos would be down your street, it is a fine show with some mighty fine men indeed!

      1. It probably went like 'how can we show her face AND her ass?' :P

        oh that's so sweet! There's a fine man's ass in Narcos. OF COURSE it's down my street.

    13. ((hugs)) on your loss and loneliness of missing Gustav. Pets are family and I can understand why you are having a tough time. It's taken me a while to get over my pets passing on.
      Narcos is a wonderful show. Boyd and Pedro are so good (I'm up to season 3, so no spoilers from me) and I am glad you are enjoying it and it's nice to see Boyd's career take off.
      I'm not surprised Fox wants to reboot Wolverine. I wish they wouldn't though.

      I remember the whole Gary Hart thing. Hugh is an attractive upgrade!

      1. Thank you :*

        I'm still on season 2, sad that Boyd and the wonderful voice-over are not in season 3 :(

        Hugh is always an attractive upgrade :P

    14. Thank you SO MUCH for the link, I really do appreciate it. I'm so sorry about your doggie ;( I know how much you adored him.

      1. You're very welcome! i am hoping I'll finally find the time to watch the film soon it's just always something getting in the way lately

    15. Hugs are on the way sati =] I know I'm on the other side of the world, but depression sucks donkey dick and keeping in touch with people is a good way to not slide deeper into it.

      *jumps off psychologist's armchair*

      Your fantasies about Hugh never fail to crack me up, hehehe. But what is with that wig!!?

      That bit with Kidman and Witherspoon was great too.

      1. That wig is probably his Oscar play next year. God I wish he went back to doing tantalizing schlock like Deception :P

      2. Lol we will never hear the end of *that* scene in Deception will we?

        Not complaining, I just love the enthusiasm!! =)

      3. There are several scenes in Deception that are...memorable :P

    16. oh, and if you ever feel like you need to get something off your chest, feel free to send me a message on twitter =] My job is to try and help people get through time times mentally, so I dunno, maybe I can make you feel a little better.

      Take care

      1. Thank you :* I have so many issues I don't think anything can help so I am just trying to focus on one thing at the time - currently my wrist returning to the not fucked up state

      2. Fair enough. Nerve damage, that is harsh.

        But in all honesty, I may sound like an arrogant dick here, but I have been studying mental health for a long time, as well as having gone through years and years of dealing with undiagnosed severe depression, epilepsy and bipolar.

        So I guess I'd like to think I could at least make you feel a little better, from someone who is going to feel empathy because I've been there so many times myself.

        Anyway, rant over. Its awesome to have you posting regularly again =)

      3. There's a lot I don't even get into here or anywhere else. A lot. There are things that are simply too private.