Secretary

(104 min, 2002)
Director: Steven Shainberg
Writers: Erin Cressida Wilson (screenplay), Mary Gaitskill (short story)
Stars: James Spader, Maggie Gyllenhaal and Jeremy Davies
Plot: Lee Holloway is a smart, quirky woman in her twenties who returns to her hometown in Florida after a brief stay in a mental hospital. In search of relief from herself and her oppressive childhood environment, she starts to date a nerdy friend from high school and takes a job as a secretary in a local law firm, soon developing an obsessive crush on her older boss, Mr. Grey. Through their increasingly bizarre relationship, Lee follows her deepest longings to the heights of masochism and finally to a place of self-affirmation.

Spank me harder

“In one way or another I've always suffered. I didn't know why exactly. But I do know that I'm not so scared of suffering now. I feel more than I've ever felt and I've found someone to feel with. To play with. To love in a way that feels right for me. I hope he knows that I can see that he suffers too. And that I want to love him.“

There are not many movies I saw that portray love accurately. In fact, the feeling itself is so grand, that only movies which show some aspects of it exist and the fact they managed to capture them is already a great achievement – there is longing (“Brokeback Mountain”), desire (“Mulholland Drive”), sweetness (“Amelie”), purity of the feeling (”The Village”) and fragility of it (“Closer”). And now “Secretary” shows beautifully another aspect of love, perhaps the most crucial one – the sense that the one you love knows what you are going through and understands you completely.


“Is it that sometimes the pain inside has to come to the surface, and when you see evidence of the pain inside you finally know you're really here? Then, when you watch the wound heal, it's comforting... isn't it? “

Fur: An Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus

(122 min, 2006)
Director: Steven Shainberg
Writers: Erin Cressida Wilson, Patricia Bosworth (book)
Stars: Nicole Kidman, Robert Downey Jr. and Ty Burrell 

Those who know us best, leave all too soon. 

(spoilers)

Lionel Sweeney will die.
But not before changing Diane Arbus forever.

We meet Diane when she enters nudist colony, then the movie goes back in time – Diane is wealthy, married with kids. Her husband is a photographer and she helps him with trivial things, like fixing models' hair or setting up the lighting, basically being an assistant, whilst ignoring her own talent.

Diane is weird – she likes exposing herself to strangers, she is fascinated by bizarre things, she seems peaceful, but suddenly she bursts into tears. Her husband doesn't understand her, he is fascinated by her, but their relationship is weak – he doesn't see inside of her, but how could he, if Diane has no idea who she really is and what she wants.

And then she meets Lionel, her enigmatic neighbor from upstairs. He makes wigs, his friends are circus performers. And one more thing – he suffers from rare disease which causes abnormal hair growth. Diane is fascinated with him from the first moment she sees him and under the pretext of wanting to take his portrait she enters his house and his world. He is forward, he is interesting, but most of all he is free. He is not living in a cage like Diane is.

As their friendship progresses Diane is spending more time focusing on herself, her work. Lionel helps her in finding her inspiration, in unleashing her personality and eventually in setting her free. He appears to be a bit of a collector – looking for bizarre people and helping them in finding their way. He is too sure of himself when Diane first goes to see him, he knows exactly what to ask her. It's like he knows that type of people inside out, he has experience with them and it brings him joy to influence Diane so much. Without meeting him she would probably live her life trapped, until her death.